So it looks like we are "All systems Go" for IVF #1 Take 2! I will continue to take birth control pills for another 2 weeks (this is to "quiet" the ovaries and help them to respond better to medical stimulation) and then my baseline bloodwork and sonogram is scheduled for 7/1. I'll start medical stimualtion a couple of days later for 8 - 10 days and then the egg retrieval and egg transfer will likely be sometime during the 2nd week of July.
I'm equal parts excited and nervous, which I know is normal. However, I've actually been having some second thoughts. Lately, I've been able to really step away from the pressures of trying to conceive and I honestly feel like the "fever" has passed a bit and I've been sooo much happier. As busy as I've been recently, I've also been having a lot of fun and really enjoying my freedom and independence. I've been exercising more again and generally feeling much more like my old self. Sadly, I haven't felt that way in a very long time.
In hindsight, I now realize what a horrible grip infertility had on me and how truly depressed I was. I DO NOT WANT TO GO BACK THERE!!! I'm absolutely terrified that this process is going to cause me to stumble and relapse and I have no interest in going back into that deep, dark hole that I was in previously. I'm just hoping and praying that I can take this "detached" attitude that I've developed with me through the process and, come what may, just keep going when it's all over and done with.
